The Impact of Parenting Styles

Watching a young girl hit, kick, and call her mother names I never imagined a 6 year old knew, engaged in an (ultimately successful) attempt to get dessert led to an enlightening luncheon conversation with a few friends last week. As parents ourselves, we had all dealt with incidents like this and had different opinions on how the mother should have handled the outbreak. As we talked, it turns out we represented the three most common parenting styles identified during the last 30 years of psychological research. What seems to matter the most is the level of parental demandingness and parents being responsive to their children’s changing needs. One end of our table clearly represented the Authoritarian parenting style, parents …

Is It Okay to Spoil Your Kids?

None of us want “spoiled” kids – kids who are bratty, self-centered, demanding, inconsiderate. So, what spoils children and what doesn’t? When I was raising my children, I was often told that I would spoil them if I didn’t let them cry – if I held them a lot. Fortunately, I didn’t believe this nonsense. You can’t spoil a child with love. Children need love as much as they need food and water. The problem is in defining “love.” We are not giving love to our children when we give them everything they want on the material level. Parents often think they are loving their children when they pile them up with all the toys or activities they desire, but …

Childhood Obesity – Family Fight

Childhood obesity, as most people now know, is effected by many behavioral factors. In addition to the behavioral changes that may be required by changing the way your child eats and how much physical activity they engage in every day, you must observe at other factors in their behavior, and in the behavior of the teachers, coaches, family members and friends that surround your child. A family is the nucleus cell that we all nourish and learn from, ideally a family is supportive and encouraging, this is usually true of parents, but the issue of siblings is completely different. If oyu feel that all members of the family do not act as one, on an active support that is ongoing …

Boost Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Many people have a strong opinion on the importance of self-esteem in children. Some people have a negative opinion and believe too much emphasis is placed on self-esteem today. Other’s believe strongly that self-esteem development is crucial in children. The truth is that both parties have a share in the truth. There is probably too much emphasis on self-esteem today and self-esteem development is crucial. However middle ground can be found between the two groups. The emphasis shouldn’t be on building self-esteem but rather helping children learn and grow so they naturally develop a feeling of worth and value. Self-esteem is a major key to success in life. The development of a positive self-concept or healthy self-esteem is extremely important …

Backpacks and Bullies. Is Your Child Prepared?

As the flurry of Back to School activities subside, parents are left to ponder more pressing issues than notebooks, backpacks, and sneakers. Will my child succeed this year? Will his academic and social growth meet my hopes and expectations? Have I done everything I can to make this possible? If you haven’t prepared your child for the school bully, not only could your dreams and aspirations end in failure, but your child could fall victim to the violence, and suffer long-lasting repercussions. Make no mistake; bullying is a form of violence. Experts estimate that almost 75% of today’s youth will be involved in some aspect of bullying before they enter high school. And chances are, your child will be among …

Do You Know Your Parenting Style?

Want to be a better parent? Knowing what your current parenting style is will help you identify your needed areas for improvement. Promoting the self-discipline and self-esteem of the children in your family often requires an emotional juggling act by you as a parent. It is not easy to be firm and demanding with a child one minute, then warm and affectionate the next. This is an ongoing education process both for the parent and for the child. In addition, many adults naturally have personalities or temperaments that predispose them toward one parenting style or another. Authoritarian Parenting Parents who tend to overemphasize the discipline side of the equation are referred to as authoritarian. Authoritarian parents are demanding in the …

How To Teach Your Children To Beat Stress

We are sending our children into a future filled with stress and conflict. Parents and teachers have the responsibility to model behaviors and teach skills that will enable our children to be productive, accepting, healthy, and above all, resilient. 1. Self-understanding and acceptance Self-esteem is a realistic estimate of your own capabilities and worth. People with high self-esteem are productive, responsive, imaginative, and attentive to the needs of others. Encourage your children to develop their natural aptitudes and interests. Set them up for success. Empower them to be more responsible. 2. Adults’ understanding and acceptance Give your children regular, focused, undivided attention. This, more than anything else, communicates your unconditional love. 3. Constructive thinking We are what we think. Fill …

How Can You Build Your Child’s Self Esteem?

As parents we know that building our child’s sense of self esteem is important. Child development specialists tell us so. However knowing it is important is not the same as knowing how to give your child a strong sense of self worth. There is no simple strategy but there are several effective techniques parents can use to help boost self esteem in their child. Let Them Know Their Value The most important strategy is to show and tell your child how much you value him and appreciate him. Spend time with him, talk to him and really listen to what he has to say, and appreciate the things that interest him. Empower Them To Make Decisions You should also teach …

Improving Your Teen’s Self-Esteem

The teenage years are often the most difficult time of childhood. During this time, children are blossoming into adults and struggle to determine the individual identity. It is no shock the teen years are the most dreaded by parents, but these fragile youngsters are at a critical time in their lives. Often, boundaries are pushed and rules are stretched by a teenager yearning to take that “next step” into adulthood. Teens find themselves not only faced with emotional transitions, but also physical changes. In the midst of these physical and emotional evolutions, a teen’s self-esteem can be compromised. Parents can take certain steps in order to ensure that a child’s self-esteem is not affected by the turbulent teenage years. The …

Five Ways To Turbo-Boost Your Parenting Skills

The ‘phone conversation had nothing at all to do with parenting – but it made me think . . . ‘Hello, Eastbank Football Club. Can I help you?’ ‘Good morning, may I speak with the Assistant Coach, please?’ ‘Oh, I’m sorry. He’s still on vacation.’ ‘I see. Is anyone on the coaching staff there?’ ‘No, they’re all away right now. The club’s closed for another week yet. I’m only the Groundsman.’ ‘Well, thanks anyway. And hey, why say you’re only the Groundsman? If it wasn’t for you, there wouldn’t be a football club. They’d have nowhere to play!’ (Pause) ‘Yeah, I’d never really thought of it like that. (Laughter) Thanks a lot, pal, you’ve made my day!’ So often we …

7 Powerful Ways to Show Love to Children

Our children are our most important legacy to the world. However, our love is our most important legacy to our children. Here are seven ways to show love that will help children build sturdy foundations for the future. 1. Spend Time with Your Children. Time is the most loving gift we can give to our children. It allows for the mutual exchange of ideas, emotions, actions, and words that help our children develop and learn to communicate. Enjoy a toddler’s tea parties as well as a teen’s ball games. Help your children build things and create art. Begin new family traditions that you can enjoy together each year. Ample time spent in mutually enjoyable activities will create memories you will …