Parenting the Attachment Challenged Child

There is much literature on how to parent challenging children these days. Unfortunately much of that literature does not typically address the child with special parenting needs and a special parenting understanding. A child that has been diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder, oppositional defiant disorder,or even depression, requires an understanding not of the behavior itself,but rather of the underlying dynamics driving the behavior. Take for example the analogy of an iceberg. Typically when we refer to an iceberg we are referring to what we see above the surface. However, 90% of every iceberg is invisible, lying under the surface. What you consider to be an iceberg is really only the tip. It’s an overwhelming thought when considering how enormous an …

Parrots to Poets — Its all in learning to say words

A ready reckoner for you to check your child’s development As a parent you may spend many anxious moments worrying whether your child is developing well, whether anything is wrong, or worrying about illnesses or learning disabilities. Well, most developmental articles or charts are just general reference points. Some babies grow and pass each stage quickly while others develop slower but do catch up. So, don’t fret if John has not said “ ba, ba or da, da,” when your neighbor’s child born a few days later already has. Every baby is like a sponge and receptive to things in his or her immediate environment. A baby who has people talking and interacting with him or her all day long …

Parents, Kids And Time Alone

“What are some of the ways in which you explain to kids that mom and dad need time alone, without feeling guilty about it?” A journalist, writing an article on having time alone and couple time when you have kids, asked me this question. Parents will feel guilty only when they believe that they are doing something wrong by spending time alone and couple time without their children. This is a false belief. The truth is that children grow up far healthier emotionally when their parents are happy and fulfilled, even if it means that their parents spend less time with them. When parents understand that they are being good parents by talking loving care of themselves and their relationship, …

No Kidding-Preparation the Key to Preventing Abducted, Missing Children

Did you know that, according to figures from the RCMP, approximately 186 children are reported missing each day in Canada? That’s one almost every 7.75 minutes; recent US statistics are much more alarming, somewhere in the United States approximately every 40 seconds a child is reported missing. In fact, by the time you have finished reading this article, the odds are that another child has been reported missing or abducted. The thought that a child could be taken or go missing is a very real fear that all of us, as parents, share. Naturally, we want to keep our children safe, but we can’t watch over them 24 hours a day. I am frequently asked by parents for advice on …

No Kidding-Preparation The Key To Preventing Abducted, Missing Children

Did you know that, according to figures from the RCMP, approximately 186 children are reported missing each day in Canada? That’s one almost every 7.75 minutes; recent US statistics are much more alarming, somewhere in the United States approximately every 40 seconds a child is reported missing. In fact, by the time you have finished reading this article, the odds are that another child has been reported missing or abducted. The thought that a child could be taken or go missing is a very real fear that all of us, as parents, share. Naturally, we want to keep our children safe, but we can’t watch over them 24 hours a day. I am frequently asked by parents for advice on …

Navigating The Dark Seas Of Maternity: Eight Wonders of a New Mother’s Underworld

Mother Nature shanghais us into procreation with visions of swan-drawn gondolas skimming across a lotus-rimmed lake. Okay, we expect there’ll be some rowing, seasickness and the occasional snapping turtle. But what happens when we find ourselves chained to the oars of a tempest-tossed, scurvy-ridden dinghy riding a fifty-foot swell straight into Monster Island? That perilous voyage into motherhood makes The Odyssey look like a Carnival Cruise. Every sea-faring demigod wrestled demons, but not with a squalling babe in arms. Or a hormonal imbalance from toxic self-doubt. And Odysseus, Jason and Hercules stumbled blindly from one adventure to the next, unfettered by the curse of expectation. The modern mother-to-be understands what she’s getting into. Until she discovers her map was drawn …

My Child Steals

Parents need to know that it is very common and normal for children under the ages of four and five to take things that do not belong to them without understanding the concept of stealing. Children need to be taught lessons in personal property and not taking something without permission. Children under the age of five are generally self-centered and their primary focus is often seeing and taking what they want. That’s why parents need to begin teaching their child the manners involved in asking permission to take, borrow or use someone else’s belongings. Parents who overlook these important lessons often receive embarrassing phone calls from their child’s school, youth programs or neighbors in regards to their child’s theft issues. …

Motivation To Succeed Develops In Early Childhood

Disclaimer: None of the content of this article should be considered medical or psychological advice. You should consult with your health care professional for specific advice relating to your medical and psychological questions or conditions. Have you ever heard about a child whom parents or teachers describe as lazy, unenthusiastic, and non-interested in any school subject or social activity? If yes, have you ever thought why this child is so low motivated, when he or she needs to do something demanding assiduity, diligence, patience, attention, tenacity, self-control and other important personal qualities? While growing up these children meet obstacles in real life and do not find enough will power, strength of mind to overcome life difficulties and achieve goals. This …

Parenting Styles – Overcoming Your Differences

If you spend any time in the parenting section of the library or your local bookstore, you will find hundreds of books on disciplining and raising your children. All the leading experts have their own ideas about what works and what doesn’t. As a parent, you have your philosophy that you bring to the table. Most of your thoughts come from what you learned as a child. You either liked the way your parents raised you, agreed with some of it and disagreed with the rest, or didn’t like any part of your parents’ ideas. Then you talk to or watch other mothers you know and these ideas get added to the mix. You take the best from all these …

Parenting Starts Before Pregnancy

While it may seem farfetched to some people, many of my clients remember what they felt and experienced while still in the womb. Comments such as these are not unusual: “I knew even before I was born that my mother didn’t want me.” “I could feel my mother’s fear and anxiety even before I was born.” Parenting does not start once the child is born. Good parenting starts even before getting pregnant. It starts by caring about what you eat, how much exercise and sleep you get, and by making sure that you are taking responsibility for your feelings of anxiety and stress. Your baby will feel what you feel, so learning how to be in peace and joy before …

Meet the Twixters!

There is a new stage of development for parents to consider. The stages of development are roughly the following: children move from infancy, to early childhood and onwards to middle childhood. These stages take roughly the first ten or so years of life. Our children then move into a long stage known as adolescence (with a number three sub-stages) that is a transition phase into adulthood. That’s it, right? No, it seems that we have another phase that links adolescence with adulthood. The twenty-first birthday used to signify a move into adulthood and all its accompanying privileges and responsibilities. Now the years from 18 until 25 and beyond seem to have become a distinct stage of life, where young people …

Make Your Baby Shower Ideas Special – 6 Golden Tips for Planning A Baby Shower (Part One)

Easy, easy. Everything on this planet can be done in a very simple way – So are your baby showers. You don’t have to be Martha Stewart to host a Shower. However, if you’re pulling your hair out as how to turn your baby shower into a really special and exciting celebration for the soon-to-be-parents, follow my 3 golden tips below. You will soon find out that planning a baby shower is just a snap and full of fun. Golden Tip 1: Let Your Imagination Flow Do you have the desire for something a little more elaborate and unique? If the answer is yes, you may need a few baby shower ideas’ triggers. I can’t imagine a baby shower without …

Linking Music To The Heart Of A Child

Music is powerful and persuasive. It touches one’s emotion, motivation, creativity and relaxation. It has the soothing effect that can calm our mental nerves. It inspires you to do something new and productive. It gives you ideas. It lulls you to sleep. The list is definitely endless. Music is many things. It makes us happy, annoyed, melancholic, afraid and mad. Music is also for every one. It invades almost anything and everything. Different milieus have their own music to recollect. Various races and continents also enjoy distinctive music. Young and old alike take pleasure in it. In every stages of life there will always be music for it is perpetual. In fact, there are unique types of music that caters …

Mom Starts Home Business Teaching Parents To Sign to Their Hearing Babies

You’ve just had this beautiful baby. And then it happens…they cry, they fuss and you have no idea what it is they want. What’s worse is that for the next 13 to 15 months you’re going to have little clue why this new beautiful bundle of joy is upset. But do you really have to wait that long? “Research has shown that while babies may lack the fine motor skills to speak, they do have the ability to understand and use language as early as 6-7 months. And given the right guidance, they have lots to say – with their hands.” Says Diane Ryan, Kindersigns founder, a certified speech and language pathologist, and an expert when it comes to teaching …

Kids Behaving Badly: A Misdiagnosed Epidemic?

What’s wrong with kids today? Although every generation seems to ask the same question, the debate on children’s manners has heated up significantly with articles, Op-Eds and even TV shows like “Nanny 911” that paint an alarming picture of manners and misbehavior unparalleled since…well, since the last generation grew up. To help desperate parents and frustrated onlookers, child development experts are pointing out clues-and perhaps cures-for the causes of what they say may be a publicly misdiagnosed epidemic. “Manners are important,” says C.T. O’Donnell II, President and CEO of KidsPeace, a 124-year-old national charity that works to bring peace to the lives of children and families in crisis. “They are vital to social order, building mutual respect, tolerance and cooperation, …

Kid Time And Couple Time

Summary: Are you having trouble finding time to be with your children and to be with each other? Discover how important this balance is, and what may be the underlying issue in the way of couple time. A reader emailed me the following question: “Many dads and moms, especially those that work full-time, are torn by guilt when it comes to time allocation. They have been away from the kids so long during the working week that the weekends MUST be spent with them. Result: There is simply NO couple-time. Any suggestions?” One thing that is often not realized by parents is that a happy and harmonious marriage is one of the greatest gifts they can give to their children. …